i guess this is gonna be an i-dont-know post.

It sucks to know that after all that we have put in, everything might just come to total waste. Its definitely not something that i would want to see&definitely not what people from outside would want to see either. i Don't know. Its a totally undescribeable feeling. Just like "This feeling's like no other~" okay crap. But i guess, maybe its our lack of faith? Nevertheless, there don't seem to be anything to give me this sudden surge of belief that everything would be fine. That award would still be within our hands.

Its just, i dont know.

I guess its only the few of us who get it, possibly? I mean, after talking it out with Vc, Debra.P, Sheena&Grace. Its really worrying, really a cause for concern &definitely something that we as seniors would not want to see happen.

Conclusion proved that its merely talks. All talk, no action. Its not just the batch, its the cohort. Ambitious? Think over again. I mean whats the use of being ambitious with the thought of merely wanting to surpass us? It's not going to be easy because we have gone through it. We know whats it like to be through this shit times. Its not easy,definitely not.

The next issue of attitude is yet another sickening fact. I don't know if its called stacking up of expectations but this expectations are not to be slackened.
We cannot afford to slacken &we cannot afford to deprove in our standard.
This efforts we put in to create the wonderful Family we have now, its not just talks. Its more then just talks. But with such attitude, i guess question mark comes into the mind.

We have gone through shit periods, really shit periods. &once even to the extent of giving up, pissing of others. &because of that, we know that its not easy. Its something that no one can understand unless we have been through it. Moving on with that thinking about trying to surpass us is not just it.

Effort put in is more than just words that you are currently spewing out of your mouths. Constant 'yes' don't seem to have any impact on your whatsoever. Your claim that your want to do it, but from what im seeing now, i can only conclude with one word. DISAPPOINTMENT. Life is going to be hard if you want to train for this because its tough, physically strenous and mentally torturing. But if your come out of it alive, battered &bruised. At least i know one thing, your have proved your worth.

However, as of now, i guess. i ain't gonna see nothing.